funny friendship quotes

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
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You know I'd like to invite you over, but I'm afraid you're so hot you'll skyrocket my air-conditioning bill.
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I haven't found Mr Right, but I have found Mr Cheap, Mr Sleazy and Mr Wrong.
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Whoever said there is no such thing as a stupid question has never worked in customer service.
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Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use
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I love men, even though they're lying, cheating scumbags
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If you're against logging, try wiping your ass with plastic.
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Whenever I'm caught between two evils, I take the one I've never triedvMae West
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